It may indeed be true that dogs are man’s best friends, but perhaps fear and discomfort should come second and third. Just like dogs, they are unshakably loyal companions in the human experience so we might as well make friends with them. We’ll discuss fear more specifically in future blogs but first let’s focus on discomfort more generally.
One of the most valuable things we can do in our lives is to build a constructive and engaging relationship with discomfort. In some ways this cuts against the grain of a culture that appears to prioritize the accumulation of material comforts and the advancement of technology to protect people against nature and solve all discomforts. People aren’t actually very physically or mentally healthy in this culture so it makes sense to question all the assumptions that drive our behavior. Particularly as we consider the sustainability and even potential collapse of our culture, it seems that there are some foundational assumptions that could use some attention.
Improving our relationship with discomfort can help each of us live more effectively. Like with dogs, it helps to be in charge in this relationship but we also need to be able to listen and learn. When we are proactive about applying appropriate discomfort in our lives we can develop our strengths and accomplish our dreams. However, when we try to avoid dealing with discomfort, ultimately it will run all over us, poop on our floor, and bite us.
I’ve been a lifelong student of history and what appears to be true about humans is that discomfort has always been a central part of all human experience. As our societies have become more “advanced” with higher standards of living we never appear to have actually escaped this reality in a fundamental way. In modern times our struggle has largely shifted from dealing with survival and exposure to nature to other forms of mental struggle and distress. Despite our technological brilliance and high standards of living, our civilization in particular seems trapped in a state of constant unsatisfied striving. Our pace of inventing machines to solve our problems is impressive, but so is our pace of inventing problems. Just like Mick Jagger said, we just can’t get no satisfaction. As we discussed in a previous blog post, this may actually be unique to our culture. Many of us who have spent some time in the never-ending chase of trying to achieve or obtain whatever we think might bring us happiness start to realize that our minds just keep painting pictures of what we don’t yet have. The idea that there’s some level of comfort or attainment that will bring freedom from the cycle appears to be an illusion.
One theory to explain this is that as humans, we seem to just be wired to tackle discomfort and challenge. This would make sense when we consider the survival conditions in which our minds evolved over millions of years. Perhaps when our lives become too easy and comfortable our minds might just create various forms of discomfort for us. This could explain why a group of people with “comfortable” survival virtually guaranteed finds itself riddled with anxiety, depression, addiction, workaholism, insecurity, and unfilled longings. Another theory for our culture’s suffering is that our hearts and souls might never truly allow comfort to exist in an exploitative, unjust, imbalanced, and/or unsustainable world. A third theory is that all life is just constantly in a state of growth and that all growth naturally happens outside of the comfort zone. Perhaps our culture is just particularly adept at medicating and consciously resisting our natural growth. Whatever the deeper causes may be, it appears that we cannot fundamentally escape discomfort in our experience of life but that we can waste a lot of effort trying to do so.
A more effective personal strategy is to accept and befriend discomfort and focus our efforts on optimizing how we manifest discomfort in our lives. When we willingly embrace discomfort in pursuit of our dreams and inspirations we can start to realize them. If we avoid discomfort and stay in our comfort zones, we will not only fail to realize our dreams and inspirations but we will likely end up with some other form of discomfort. It could be mental discomfort like feelings of frustration over our unrealized dreams or feelings of inadequacy over our failure to act effectively. It could be a physical ailment because we didn’t take care of our body or manage our stress well.
Not all discomfort is equal. It can take functional or dysfunctional expressions. Dysfunctional discomfort is mostly just pointless suffering. Examples are beating ourselves up, wanting things that we don’t have, striving for things that won’t truly fulfill us, staying caught in pointless rat races or states of personal stagnation, etc. Functional discomfort is struggle in support of our development and our inspirations. It often involves progressive challenges, positive habits, and facing obstacles. All challenges can serve as growth opportunities and the quicker we can see and embrace the benefits that lie in facing a challenge the stronger we can become.
Discomfort usually comes for us when we don’t make a point of directing ourselves at functional discomfort. We can either approach the discomfort that drifts into our lives functionally or dysfunctionally. For example, lifestyle diseases like obesity or cardiovascular disease can serve as a wake up call to get our health in order. Or they can kill us.
If we are truly interested in optimizing our training and development, we can approach discomfort not as something we strive to reduce in our lives but as something that we progressively can handle in greater amounts as we steer towards greater inspiration and higher purpose. This is the way all training works. One of the key principles of developing strong muscles is progressive overload (i.e., the idea that we progressively build up our muscle’s ability to handle greater resistance). It’s no different when training for other types of strength.
Befriending and learning to work effectively with discomfort is one of the key ways that our athletic pursuits can help us develop as people and benefit all areas of our lives. Inspiration is the fuel source that allows us to do this. Without inspiration we’re unlikely to really push our comfort zone adequately for development. Therefore, if athletic inspiration shows up in our life we can harness and cultivate it in order to learn to work more effectively with discomfort. The ability to hold discomfort in balance with its corresponding inspiration and coordinate and harness it effectively is a potent and transferable personal skill. This is the essence of training and the development of this skill is far more important than the achievement of any particular outcome for which we are training. This particular skill we reinforce every day in our training programs and we practice deeply in our most difficult athletic challenges.
Let’s get uncomfortable and let’s make it a habit. There’s no escaping discomfort but we can choose the discomforts that support our inspirations and development and we can manage the ways that we apply them. This is preferable to letting unwanted discomforts yank us around and destroy our health. It’s cold outside. It's time to do some kettlebell work in my yard.
As you think about your training this week, remember that you are holding discomfort and inspiration in balance so it makes sense to focus attention on each. Consider the following:
What is your current relationship to discomfort? What is more important to you: comfort or inspiration? What would you rather do: live an easy life or be strong and healthy?
What would you do if you accomplished all of your goals? Would you be comfortable? Would you be happy? If so, are you sure? What information are you basing that on? Have you ever been sold a fantasy of comfortable leisure? Do you believe this is possible?
What discomforts are you good at facing in life and what discomforts do you struggle with? How are you approaching these differently in your mind?
How inspired are you in your training? Have you been pushing your comfort zone in training? What are you willing to do for your inspiration?
Do you have an athletic inspiration that fuels your training? Can you visualize it? How vivid is that vision? An inspiration is like a flame that needs oxygen. With enough attention the flame can grow into a bonfire that will burn through resistance and obstacles. If you are struggling to find and build inspiration it can be helpful to read outdoor magazines, watch adventure documentaries, hang out with adventurous friends, spend time in nature, and browse around in outdoor recreation stores and talk to employees. However, it is most important to go do things. Try some different activities. See what you like. Challenge yourself and see how it makes you feel. When we open ourselves our inspirations make themselves known to us
Comments